Good Night, Gracie

Death is inevitable for every human being. 
But as a parent, you never expect it to happen to any of your children before it happens to you. Especially not before their first birthday. Especially never. My heart is with Tom, Michele, their kids and extended family members and friends as they mourn, cope, and experience life without their daughter/sister/grand daughter/cousin/niece/friend/etc. My cousin Tiffany is Gracie's aunt and her girls, who are Kelsey's "cousins," are the ones I hope learn to take this experience and have it be a strength in their life. I hope they always have the goal of returning to live with Heavenly Father, Jesus, and Gracie.

This morning, as I reluctantly and yet anxiously checked Gracie's blog, I expected to bawl. I expected to stay home today and be weepy (I'm pregnant, give me some credit here). I expected to hug my baby lots and write in my journal, take a nap and hope that tomorrow comes quickly. It was gloomy, rainy and overcast morning- and easily set the mood. 

But as I opened her blog, heard the beautiful music, and read Tom's "Good Night, Gracie" post, I felt peace. Of course I cried, even sobbed, but felt peace. I brought my husband in and told him she had passed. I kissed Kelsey and told her baby Gracie had gone to heaven. She nodded and said "yeah." Of course she already knew. I bawled to a friend who had also been following Gracie's story, but felt so much peace at the same time. Maybe that's what Tally was really fasting for - me not to fall apart. No seriously, he told me Sunday he felt like it was a fast for the family members and not for Gracie. He felt she would be with Heavenly Father soon and be freed from her failing body. And he felt peace. I got out of the house and went into the city with some friends...and made the most of today. 

Yesterday, I accidentally spilled spaghetti sauce all over our white, cloth couches (it's not coming out). My first reaction/thought was "that is the worst thing that could possibly happen." Immediately, perspective flooded through me as I thought of Tom & Michele, who were likely kissing their baby goodbye at that time. How unrealistic am I!?

I am grateful to have been able to watch the example of the Gledhill family. Through all the unimaginable trials, they kept their faith and shared it with the rest of us. They shared their precious daughter with us and allowed us to experience a portion of the joys and sorrows that came along with her too-short life. I am also grateful that she is at peace and pray for peace and understanding to those she left behind, especially the little ones. 

Good night, Gracie. I have learned from you to cherish my time on Earth, and my little one(s) every move. See you on the other side baby girl.